I have experienced those times in life when I didn’t think I would make it out. Seemed every day was a challenge to complete. When you find yourself challenged over and over again, and things are not going as planned -you might need to look at the root cause.
One thing I can always go back to when thinking about the past, are my mistakes. The mistakes I’ve made along the way were learning experiences. I have learned a lot about life in the short time I have lived. One thing I’ve learned is that when the bad outweighs the good, a change is needed to get back to the better things in life. I had my share, there were those that I could control. Then there were those bad times that took control. As I have gotten older in mind and body. I can separate the two.
When you’re sucked into the vacuum of addiction, there is no way out but to empty the bag. Many addicts cannot see their life being sucked away because of the dust that addiction is causing. When you are sitting in a room for hours on end with the dope buddies, seems alright as everyone gets their high on. What is to happen when the party is over and the laughter stops? When the last of the last has been finished off? This is when the vacuum starts to suck you in. Reality takes on an ominous darkness of failed choices. The chemical in the brain that makes you feel euphoric has been super charged for hours on end and now the dopamine is depleted.
You’re starting the phase of coming down. Depression easily can take over the mind, especially if you’ve found yourself getting behind on the rent and bills to chase the dragon. You find yourself just a bit more in debt. The false reality that you are more productive because you are high is a myth. What I am talking about is methamphetamine.
Your right, you can get some things accomplished but it is only a matter of time before that once found pick me up becomes a put me down. From staying up so long, it only becomes a matter of time before you start to decline. Work performance deteriorates, and life starts to slip by. Bills become unattainable to pay and everything bad seems to intensify. Then the unthinkable takes place, as you find yourself chasing the dragon again. The Law gets involved, and fortunately for some that is a life saver. For others it just adds to the Issues of getting high. Hey now, just let me tell ya it’s fun in the beginning, but in the end the chaos will eat you from the mind out.
On the cool there were many times I found myself thinking “Man I may not make it out this time.” I had spent many years of my life wasted, due to the fact that I could not get passed the resentments that chained me to a life of hell. In the end at the age of thirty, a blessing happened. My first child was to change my world from selfish intent, to one of sharing and love.❤
I’d like to say as bad as it all sounds, it was just that bad. I have overcome that revolving door of prison and addiction. If you accidentally dropped your stash, I’d throw it away for you. Find a way out, you may think there is no way. I’m here to tell you there is. Get inspired to have a better life. Contact me, perhaps I can help.
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When I sit down to write, I take what has affected me and put it all into words in an effort to inspire men and women from all walks of life. I had no clue that sharing my story would have the impact that it has. It’s a fact that writing can and will set you free from issues that have kept you held captive as a prisoner of self-doubt and mental torment.
I have a God found love for humanity. I want those suffering from one issue or another to know that they can break the chains that hold them down. If you need someone to talk to, I’m here for you.